Getting wet

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The pandemic has got my brain firing ideas all over the place. It’s like a phone pinging me notifications and suggestions of things I should try or pursue. One of those things is taking pictures. I’ve been taking pictures ever since my Mum bought me a 35mm Minolta SLR for my 12th birthday. I’ve loved it ever since, but have never seriously tried to get better.

What better time to do that than now then? Rather than just snap, snaps like everyone with a smartphone, I wanted to focus my attention on a specific area. Water, I thought, would be a good place to start. I’m lucky enough to live near the sea and I like to get wet – perfect.

I snagged a beat up underwater housing from eBay and got snapping. Below are the preliminary results. So far I’m terrible at controlling myself in the water. I get knocked over by waves and struggle to get myself into position for a decent shot. Still, I’ll keep trying and will share my progress on here for your perusal. If you have any tips or advice for underwater/on water photography, lemme know!

Subscribe to my TWITCH

Random Bollocks

I know, I know. Twitch is for 14-year-old kids to get off watching sexy women 10 years their senior playing Fortnite. Maybe, but now it’s also a place you can watch a 34-year-old bearded fool chatter on for an hour around lunch time.

SUBSCRIBE TO MY TWICH •••CLICK HERE•••

Every Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday I will be LIVE on Twitch from 12 noon. The world can sometimes feel it’s going to hell in a handcart, so this is an opportunity for us all to step back, take a deep breath and have a think about what’s really going on. Nothing is off the table, this is a safe place to express your views and talk to me directly. Yup, there is even a phone you can call.

Think of it as radio for the social media era.

So head over to my Twitch and become a subscriber •••CLICK HERE•••

Here’s how to watch the greatest LIVE show on the Internet

InterTrash

There is no doubt about it that InterTrash LIVE is the best show on the internet. It’s an indisputable fact, unless it is, which it isn’t…maybe.

But how do you watch the best show on the internet and make the absolute most of it? Well, now there are multiple ways you can tune in and watch me entertain you. Here’s how.

Facebook

Ahh, Zuckerberg’s data hoarding love child. Yup, Facebook is one of the places you can watch InterTrash.

To tune in go HERE and like my Facebook page. If you have notifications switched on, you get a pop up when I’m going live.

When you’re on the video, if you have a smart T.V you can beam it right to the big screen and still partake in the chatting action. Here’s how…

  1. Make sure your TV is connected to a streaming device (example: Apple TV, Chromecast, Samsung TV, Amazon Fire TV or Android TV) and is on the same Wi-Fi network as your mobile device or computer.
  2. Open the Facebook app on your mobile device or computer and find the video you’d like to stream.
  3. Tap the video to expand it to full screen mode.
  4. Tap  in the top right of the video.
  5. Select the TV where you’d like the video to play.

Bob’s your uncle.

Future leader of the world, Mark Zuckerberg

YouTube

YouTube was founded in 2005 by a couple of nerds who filmed themselves at the zoo. From then it has gone from strength to strength showcasing people opening boxes and putting iPads into blenders.

It’s also another place you can watch InterTrash LIVE. To tune in go and subscribe to my YouTube Channel HERE.

If you want to watch it on the big screen, or whatever size screen you have in your house, you can use magic (aka science and technology) to do that. Just follow these steps.

  1. Make sure that your mobile device or computer is connected to the same Wi-Fi network as Chromecast or smart T.V
  2. Open the YouTube app  or YouTube.com.
  3. Tap the Cast button Inactive cast extension Tip: On the YouTube app, the cast button is at the top of the Home screen. From YouTube.com on your laptop, it’s in the bottom-right corner of the player.
    Note: You can also open YouTube.com and cast directly from the Chrome browser.
  4. Tap the Chromecast or smart T.V to which you want to cast and then tap Play. Your content will start playing on the TV connected to that Chromecast device.
The FIRST EVER YouTube Video

Twitter

Oh my god I can watch it on Twitter?! Yeah, not that you’d want to, but let’s say you’re on Twitter and you’ve spent the last 27 minutes reading nobby tweets from Donald Trump or scrolling through Fesshole and you fancy a change.

To tune in simply follow me on Twitter HERE

^^^ The kind of thing you get on Fesshole^^^

To Conclude

All you need to know is that there are multiple ways you can tune into InterTrash LIVE and all will be just as fun as the other. All you need to remember really is

THURSDAY 8:30PM

See you there.

•LL¡∑

Text Me Instead Week 1

Text Me instead

You can send you messages to +447927612791

  • I’m tired. Like really tired of my kids. I’m tried of the ‘trying to be positive’. I think I’ll be fine. Just comes in waves.
  • I checked into this because of your service, and it turns out that for many people international texting is free. So, with that said, why aren’t there … (message ends)
  • Hi Ollie – I do get some inspiration from scrolling and cat videos but more creativity comes when I am left to silence. Like right now as I stroll through a li…(message ends)
  • An extraordinarily large percentage of my newly alphabetised herbs and spices begin with C…is that just me?

UNTIL NEXT WEEK!

InterTrash LOCKDOWN LIVE

InterTrash

Summon THE GLOVE FROM ABOVE, bash your screen, get mad, get happy and witness the best live quiz/gameshow on the internet, probably.

InterTrash LOCKDOWN LIVE is an online experience the likes of which you have never…err…experienced. It’s like swimming in warm ice cream while being sexually pleasured by fantastical creatures tickling your bits, winning the lottery, Trump losing the next election and Brexit being cancelled all rolled into one massive, stupid, idiotic digital splurge for you to gobble up.

HOW TO PLAY

First things first, we need to summon the GLOVE FROM ABOVE. Until this happens, nothing happens. To do that one of you must choose an appropriate song to coax it from it’s rubbery heaven.

The Glove From Above

Once coaxed, the game can begin.

There are FIVE categories that you can choose from. To decide which round you want first, just bash away on the appropriate emoji. The one with the most votes is up. Here are the rounds.

Game Of Moans

A celeb punching a pap, a politician getting riled in an interview or someone losing it in a socially distanced super market queue, Game Of Moans takes moments of fury and delivers weak and ill-thought-out questions from them for you to answer. It’s mostly so we can laugh at famous people losing their shit, because their famous and, well, Chris Martin getting angry never get’s old

LOL

We all love a LOL, but no one has ever LOLLED when they’ve written LOL. They may have smirked, but that’s about it. This round is sure to make your smirk. Maybe. I’m not gonna promise anything.

That's Cute

Dogs eating children’s ice cream, cats falling down anything or a child hilariously asking an Alexa for some seriously hardcore dildo action by mistake. All of these moments are simply joyous and are what this is round is made for. Also, it’s a heart. What the fuck else was I supposed to do?

The Arts

Music, movies, theatre, art (NOT CRAFTS) books, all that stuff smashed into a round for the well cultured. 

WTF

Want your mind blown? then stick around for this belter of a round. Did you know oranges were originally green?! FUCK ME!!! or that there’s no specific time zone at the South Pole?! HOLY FUCKING SHIT?! Or that Nicholas Cage IS AN ACTOR?! KA BOOOOOOOOOOM!!!

Join me every WEDNESDAY at 8pm to find out what all the fuss is about. Bring a drink, boozy or not and get yourself ready for some stupidity.

Remind yourself on the link at the top, and I’ll see you there.